300 Empty Days

· 3 min read

It’s been over three hundred days since I posted something here (basically a year), and that feels like an abysmal failure. I’ve changed job, house and mindset on a number of things, but most of all, but having not had anything burningly important to post I’ve come to the question of, do I have nothing to talk about, or is this how everyone feels (especially at the moment)?

Part of the problem is that I’m comparing myself to others which is problematic to do, after all, if you’re looking at other blogs or vlogs you’re not seeing anything that goes on behind the scenes, you’re seeing the highlight real of that person (in whichever aspect they want to share, whether that be photos on Instagram or cool ideas on Youtube videos). But that only covers part of the problem, the other part is the idea that things I could put up here aren’t justifiable. People like to present themselves as knowing exactly what they’re talking about, to show that they have the answer to whatever question is being asked even if they don’t. Personally though, telling readers how to write or how something works doesn’t feel right to me, even when I’ve done the digging and feel confident in my findings - perhaps a mild case of impostor syndrome?

So where do I go from here then - do I take on what others have done in blogs that I’ve seen, fire off on tangents about politics and current affairs (there’s definitely plenty of low hanging fruit to rage about there)? I don’t think so, part of the problem with that approach is it doesn’t feel beneficial to anyone involved, yes it might be true to how I think or feel either way in the moment but it isn’t providing anyone with anything and I think the world has enough outrage media at the moment, with all the headline designed to make you made and buy the paper/magazine or click the link to the article/video. And it just muddies up everything else, after all, if you’re getting those stories from everywhere else why would you listen to me talk about it, when I’m neither eminently qualified in those particular areas - and in some cases might even be on a different side of the world to whatever I’m talking about.

No, I’d rather steer clear of that whole circus.

So where does that leave me, riding on a circle of “I’ll write a post every X weeks!” only to find myself spinning my wheels trying to find something to write about and missing that goal I set for myself. Dropping the ball because life “got in the way” and abandoning writing this week’s post because it doesn’t really matter? Unfortunately I know that making a promise of “I’ll do x this week!” seldom works, and there’s more than enough proof out there that trying to do things through force of will alone is a recipe to end up back where you started. No, I need a more methodical approach, so I have a list of topics I’m interested in covering and I’ve got a calendar event once a week to work on them.

But I’m still only going to post things that I think are interesting or relevant, even if that means branching out into some other topics a little more (like games or design - there’s a lot of topics I could cover there, I think). Of course I’ll keep them separated as best I can with tags so you can always filter out what you’re not interested in.

So, if this works, I’ll see you next week.